This topic has been so heavy on my heart lately. Personally, it’s an area of my life that I have been so challenged on so lately. It is like God is taking an area of my life, exposing it and using it to humble me over and over, and over, again. Any parent knows that children bring out your true character. Any married person knows that your spouse is able to bring out your character as well. As a single, I never realized how much “ugliness” I had in my life. I’ve realized so much about how important character is to God. I also want to be 100% candid: I am the last one that should be writing about something like this because I am far from perfect in this area. I have learned so much of about the grace of God, but never can even try to use it as an excuse to keep sinning and ignoring this area of my life.
What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? Certainly not! How shall we who died to sin live any longer in it? Romans 6:1
Since being married for almost 12 years, Timothy and I were always involved in ministry. We started as leaders in our college ministries. In the beginning years of marriage, Timothy being a youth pastor, then we transitioned to being a part of a young adult leadership team. Shortly after that, it was pioneering a college ministry at a large secular university. We also served and helped pioneer a church plant. Now, we are full time missionaries in YWAM (Youth With A Mission). After all these years, it has only been more recently that God has been highlighting character to me. I’ve been a believer for nearly 20 years, but maybe its something I’ve never done introspection on because I didn’t realize how much I needed major heart surgery and transformation.
Refining is never a bad thing if we are willing and open to allow Him to transform us. I realized my wilderness or “job” season of being terribly ill for years with a baby and toddler brought out so much in me that I didn’t know was there. I think we all have “wilderness” seasons in our lives, but it is always what we do in the midst of trial that tests our character. I’ve learned how important character is to God and that you can have a “name” name in ministry, but if you lack the character, your ministry will most likely eventually shatter. I’ve witnessed this happen time and time again. I am so glad I don’t have a “name” in ministry because I believe my character needs a ton of refinement.
One day, I had Holy Spirit whisper to me, if you had a video camera set up in your house, Jonali, would people you are in ministry with be surprised in the way you talk to your husband and children? Do you exemplify the same character at home as you do in front of people? I was a little surprised, yet so challenged at the same time. I want to be the person who is the same exact person at home as I am in the public. I don’t want to be two different people with the same name. I want to be the same Jonali and mom and wife so that my kids can see consistency in things like fruit of the spirit from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and having self-control. I realize that without God, there can be no transformation.
So the question, how do we live a life full of good character? I think the key is always relationship with our Creator. He is in the transformative business and created us to be like Him. He is an expert at taking our weaknesses and making them into strengths. He also loves to make the impossible, possible. The key though is choosing to be completely dead to ourselves and surrendered and obedient to Him and Holy Spirit. He desires that we walk in transparency and consistency. He knows our behavior behind closed doors and in public. He knows our motives and heart attitude. He knows when we are putting up a front or being genuine.
We were made for such a time as this, and if we truly reflect His character, people who witness our lives will want the God of transformation in their lives, as well. We won’t be labeled as hypocritical Christians any longer, but genuine followers of God who possess something the world doesn’t: a pure, holy life that reflects the beauty of a Savior.
The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Galatians 5:22-23